Question Re Proper Island Greeting

Chickadee · Post by **Chickadee** » Mon Mar 15, 2010 9:18 am

I know it is always best to start a conversation with Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening and I try hard to remember that (and think it's quite a nice custom).

The part where you lose me on the custom is the dead air that follows.

Stateside, I would expect my interaction (at say a shop) to go like this: (Me) Good Morning! (Attendant) Good Morning! How can I help you? or Good Morning! How are you today? (Me) I am well, thank you, how are you? (Attendant) Good thanks. How can I help you? (Me) I wonder if you can help me find....

On Island it goes more like this: (Me) Good Morning!..... dead air...... Um, how are you today?.... more dead air.... I am wondering if you can help me find...

Sometimes I feel like I'm maybe just not waiting long enough for that initial response (lack of Island Time rhythm?).

Thoughs, especially from locals?

toes in the sand · Post by **toes in the sand** » Mon Mar 15, 2010 1:59 pm

Both on island and home...
-Good morning, how are you today?
+Doing well, and yourself?
-I am fine, enjoying this wonderful weather.
+Me too although we could use some rain......
.....5 minutes of weather (or whatever) discussion later...
-could you help me find.....
-Thank you so much. Enjoy your day.

I guess that I don't difficulties with "island ettiquette" as the "rules" are pretty much the same where I am from. Courtesy begets courtesy.

mahojim · Post by **mahojim** » Mon Mar 15, 2010 2:20 pm

Well put, Toes!
Also, as I've read before, try to avoid saying "excuse/pardon me" when trying to capture a locals' attention. That's evidently misconstrued as being rude, even if you have the best intentions.
Smiles-
MJ

Gromit · Post by **Gromit** » Mon Mar 15, 2010 4:32 pm

"Good Night" is the appropriate term instead of "Evening"

Also, I generally find that folks are waiting to see if you're going to rush into anything.

Just be patient.

A sure bet for me: "Good morning/afternoon/night" followed by a brilliant smile. That usually takes the edge off.

Also discussing the weather is a good option.

jayseadee · Post by **jayseadee** » Mon Mar 15, 2010 4:53 pm

Jennifer - I had similar experiences in November. I was so surprised at how many shops I visited - said a very pleasant "Good XXX" and smiled - and got no response from the shop keeper. Needless to say, I took my business elsewhere.

NCSue · Post by **NCSue** » Mon Mar 15, 2010 8:09 pm

I find that like anywhere else - making a connection depends on both parties. Everytime we've been in Dolphin, my brother starts some good-natured picking on me, brother/sister stuff. EVERY TIME - the clerk started laughing and asking me if I wanted him thrown out! Obviously - she was someone's sister! I guess I just don't overthink it alot.

cwaver · Post by **cwaver** » Mon Mar 15, 2010 8:23 pm

I've been visiting these islands since 1992. almost every year . Sometimes twice a year. Been saying "good morning/afternoon/evening till I was blue in the face.
Sometimes a get a positive response . And sometimes an attitude. Do you think they will ever have a program instucting the locals on how to be nice to us?

Exit Zero · Post by **Exit Zero** » Mon Mar 15, 2010 8:48 pm

Do many people on this forum think that there should be a -- " program instructing the locals on how to be nice to us" -- somehow this statement just doesn't ring true to me.

cypressgirl · Post by **cypressgirl** » Mon Mar 15, 2010 9:09 pm

I find folks are folks, and it doesn't matter where you go. If I go in a shop on STJ or Paris, I'm always friendly, as that is my general nature. If I say good day, good afternoon, good night, or hi-how-r-u, I get a better response being my true Texas self...genuine and true to me, and always respectful. If I tell myself to walk in the door and say "good afternoon", and "hi, how are you, ya havin' a nice day?" comes out, I almost always get a very friendly response. I don't think my exact words are as important as my true emotions and respect.

Berlingirl · Post by **Berlingirl** » Mon Mar 15, 2010 9:35 pm

Exit Zero wrote:Do many people on this forum think that there should be a -- " program instructing the locals on how to be nice to us" -- somehow this statement just doesn't ring true to me.

That really couldn't have been a serious question...

Margy Z · Post by **Margy Z** » Mon Mar 15, 2010 11:39 pm

cwaver wrote:I've been visiting these islands since 1992. almost every year . Sometimes twice a year. Been saying "good morning/afternoon/evening till I was blue in the face.
Sometimes a get a positive response . And sometimes an attitude. Do you think they will ever have a program instucting the locals on how to be nice to us?

You're kidding, right?????

equinox · Post by **equinox** » Tue Mar 16, 2010 6:07 am

I was a little disappointed on my recent trip. I had my best island manners and I did not think it helped all that much. I'm not saying the people on St. John were un-friendly, but they were not especially friendly, either. They were normal, just like everywhere else. This good morning...etc. is not a magic bullet. Do it because it is the custom, but don't expect any special response

Wakey · Post by **Wakey** » Tue Mar 16, 2010 7:39 am

Exit Zero wrote:Do many people on this forum think that there should be a -- " program instructing the locals on how to be nice to us" -- somehow this statement just doesn't ring true to me.

The island needs tourist dollars, no?

Does your income depend on tourist dollars?

I would imagine just about anyone that has a job down there does unless you work via the web.

djmom · Post by **djmom** » Tue Mar 16, 2010 8:41 am

Ok, after thinking about this. Yes, there are lots of times people don't start just chatting away when I say "good morning". There are also times here in Charlotte where I talk to a clerk and be friendly and they look at me like I am an alien.

It is not just about courtesy. If someone returns my "good morning" with "good morning"--that is being polite. They have fulfilled their social "obligation" in my opinion.

If they don't launch into a conversation...well maybe they don't know what to say either. Or maybe they don't like chatting it up with everyone who comes by. Or their personality just isn't that way. I think most island people are probably pretty modest.

People from the islands can be shy too. Just 'cause they don't act like a person from the Sandals commercials doesn't mean they are being rude.

mindehankins · Post by **mindehankins** » Tue Mar 16, 2010 8:48 am

equinox wrote:I was a little disappointed on my recent trip. I had my best island manners and I did not think it helped all that much. I'm not saying the people on St. John were un-friendly, but they were not especially friendly, either. They were normal, just like everywhere else. This good morning...etc. is not a magic bullet. Do it because it is the custom, but don't expect any special response

This has been our experience, as well, though we've only been to St. John twice. In general, I'd say the reception was generally not as friendly as in our small town in Western NY. If we don't elicit a conversational response to our "good morning, how are you today?" we just get on with business, just like here at home, when we enounter someone having a bad day.
ALWAYS been treated super friendly by the folks at the grocery store near Conrad Sutton's, Candi's Ribs, St. John Hardware, St. John Spice, Courtesy Car Rental, Miss Vie's, and the Tourist Trap. They must hire extra-cheerful folks!

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